Those Dangerous Games

There are politicians who like to preach that we should ban video games, burn them, protect our stupid minds from them because if we don't we'll go on a rampage of carjacking, killing prostitutes, and randomly beating guys on the street with a baseball bat in hopes glowing money will pop out of them.

Grand Theft Auto I am looking at you.

I didn't believe you political fringe types, I thought maybe you just realized you spend a lot of time and money to get elected only to discover you don't really believe in anything and so desperate, you looked for the easiest target to go after. Porn was taken by the Junior Representative from Lackawanna County, and the movie industry was under attack from a Senator out of Utah, so you thought you'd settle for video games.

That's what I thought, I did. Until I realized you were right! It's hit me!

You my dear fear mongering friend of Fox News were right, its happened to me!

One day I am immersed in several hours of Mario Kart Wii (Rainbow Road I will make you mine!) then the next I am driving my Saturn, minding my own business. Suddenly this guy starts riding my tail, he's all up behind me and I don't know what to do.

Perhaps if I was a level headed video game free individual I would have just let him go about his tailgating. Perhaps.

But no, I did something so horrible, so shameful it is hard to admit.

I finished the banana I was eating, rolled down my window and then... then... yes, that's right I did it! I through the banana peel back at his car.

But it gets worse, my slippery slide into mindless, easily influenced video gamer continued.

I don't even want to tell you what happened, but lets just say the turtle I promised my little sister I'd take to the vet, well it never made it.

So you were right and I was wrong. We can not trust video games, we as humans are so stupid. How could I ever have doubted you?

I have to end this here, have to rush to the pet store before my sister gets out of school. I'm kind of cutting it close, but I figure if I pop a few mushrooms it should give me the speed boost I need to make it in time.